Welcome to my Life
Let’s start with , why blogging ?
Well, I am a very secretive person . I don’t go on telling people how boring or sad my life is . I don’t like talking about my life . And because of this I have become this mysterious girl for everyone . I keep a lot of things to myself , my thoughts are piling up and this is why I suffer from a lot of emotional breakdowns.
One of my friend knew about this and said, ” if you don’t want to tell people about your thoughts why not write about it, that might help you with your breakdowns .” I thought for a while, looked myself in the mirror with watery eyes and gave myself a ‘no you can’t do it’ look . I feel like the more I reveal myself to people they will think i am weak. which, of course i am not.
But it’s a new year , and keeping all these thoughts to myself is exhausting me and i am afraid it will harm me as well. So here i am trying something new, writing my very first “blog”.
Who am I?
I am insecure, stubborn, anxious and also 19 years old . Half of my life has gone from shifting from one city to another or from one state to another . But i won’t complain about it . why?
Because I love going to new places . I don’t like sticking at one place with limited people . I love to explore, to gain experiences, that’s what makes our life worth living . In the year 2011, I came to this beautiful city – Mumbai and it’s been 8 years now .
The one thing I like about this place is you are never alone . You might feel lonely but not alone. There’s just something about this place that can’t be expressed in words its more of a feeling. This city never stops for anyone . Every individual is unique and so much more to learn from them.
There’s always a “BUT”. As happy as this city makes me , it also gives me a lot of anxiety. I do love meeting new people getting to know them , sticking around is a task for me . I don’t know why i feel i am a burden on everybody- my parents, sister , friends . I make myself believe that i will stop expecting from people but in the end it’s the same story.
I am very positive when it comes to other people . I will always support them but when it comes to me I don’t know , it’s like I have lost faith in myself . I don’t trust my actions anymore. Last few years were very hard for me and all I am doing is running away from reality . But the more you run from it , the more it will come chasing you . So I stopped running. Now i will face the reality get myself to trust again. And even if/when I fail , i will get back up and fight again. I screwed up a lot of things , not anymore. I will make sure 2019 is my year.
Everyone has inside them a piece of good news. The good news is you don’t know how great you can be, how much you can love, what you can accomplish and what your potential is.
The world has enough negativity already . Let’s try to make world a better place by being positive and helping each other out . I know it’s hard to be happy all the time with all the negativity ,surrounding us but we can try, right?
Lastly, few of the things that keeps me going:
1) My beautiful sister
2) My love for dogs .
A two legged person can never give the kind of happiness what a four legged dog can give. Also, this is not my dog. Although, I wish I had one.
If you are still here reading this – you’re beautiful and thank you so much for sticking around.